Floods of Tears and Memories

July1, 2010

I can look at the dock and visualize a memory of something that happened between Mell and I there. I can look at the fireplace and remember him starting it just for me. As I look at our handy work in the kitchen when we remodeled...the memories flood me !

Even every time I pass the wind sock I remember Mell and Dale and me working to get that thing flying !

As the tree that held our hammock fell recently. Our last trip here we had it cut down...I had to figure out how to hang our hammock on my own..without my sweet Mell...it was sad...but I did it....so I found a 4x 4 and dug a hole and hung the hammock from the tree to the pole. I thought it looked funny when the hammock wasn’t there so it needed a little something. Someone had given Mell a sign that said ”Hall’s Dock” we had it hung in the house...I decided to hang it on the pole...I think he would have liked it !

Things are so hard for me...this trip...easier in some ways...yet harder in others...memories are really flooding my heart this trip.

and the tears just flow...Maybe I can imagine what God’s word means when it says “ Surely goodness and “MERCY” will follow you all the days of your life” Have mercy on me God is my prayer everyday...and to sleep in peace. I must continue to look on toward my new future without Mell…

Hebrews 12:1-2

let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. 2Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

I don't have to get over my grief…His power will get me through it….I don't have to put on a happy face…His peace will fill me up…The Lord gives Strength to his people…He blesses his people with peace. Psalm 29:11

I don't have to have the whole picture of what He is doing in my life…I just have to believe God does love me…and continue on by faith and not by sight ! Truly I can't see it right now…blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed." John 20:29