Three months have passed since my sweetheart has gone home.
I miss him more each day...everyday I have to say goodbye all over again..but my mind is clearing up and I can think more and remember more...the hurt is still so bad but I am determined with the strength of the Lord to continue on the path that we were headed.
I feel like a bulldozer sometimes just clearing a path that I can
walk through...or a man with a machete cutting a path through
the jungle..its hard work...but in the end it makes walking through easier!
Today was a big day for me. I came to the Island for my second time without Mell... I put the boat in the water and I drove it to the what we on the Island call “”The Hill” why we call it the hill was my question the last time we were here together, because there is no hill that I can see. But they all say it is more of a hill than the Island! My neighbor Donelle road with me as a support but I did it alone. It was crazy but I did it...I was emotionally exhausted on the return..but I did it!
This was something I had to do alone and I did it. Tomorrow I have to put the boat back on the hoist...that is the only thing Mell never made me do...I helped him over and over and watched him do it but I never did it ...so it will be a real challenge for me.
This second time here was different than the last time...it was still hard but just different. Just being here makes me feel good. It was our special place and a lot of our closeness and growth in the Lord and with each other happened here at the Island. We spent a lot of time here together alone.
My neighbor Bill came over and showed me 3 or so different ways to put the boat back on the hoist…we did it over and over…Bill was determined to help me and I was determined to do it alone! Finally I think I did it! Thanks Bill!